Season Four

The Freshman

"My band's played here a lot. It's still all new. I don't know what the hell's going on."

Willow: "How can you be so calm?"
Oz: "Long, arduous hours of practice."

Xander: "Do we hug?"
Oz: "I think we're too manly."

To Buffy: "Need a hand?"

Living Conditions

Xander: "Oh, a technique I know well. Hit the girl with your best shot, then hasta."
Oz: "Gotta respect the drive-by."
Xander: "Low rejection. Fond memories."

Buffy: "And the worst part? I wake up, and there's Kathy staring at me like I'm some kind of freak."
Oz: "Well, actually, the worst part I'd have to go with, the demon pouring the blood down your throat."

Buffy: "Cool. You guys can do the brain thing. I'm gonna go to class."
Oz: "Which could also be construed as the brain thing."
Buffy: "Not when you're minoring in Napping 101."
Willow: "Okay, so that was the evil twin, right? 'Cause she was bordering on Cordelia-esque."

Giles: "Let me know if she, um..."
Oz: "Hits the red zone?"

Willow: "What kind of demon runs around putting ooky blood dreams into people's heads? Like some kind of nightmare fairy. It's not right."
Oz: "Well, I'm against it."

Willow: "If it wasn't for this English paper, I'd be there right now, listening, doing the girly best-friend thing."
Oz: "Well, I can do that."
Willow: "You can?"
Oz: "Oh, I'm not saying we'll braid each other's hair... probably. But I can hang with her, watch for signs she's going over the edge."

Buffy: "So then, Kathy's like, "It's share time," and I'm like, "Oh, yeah? share this!" (mimes punches)"
Oz: "So either you hit her, or you did your wacky mime routine for her."
Buffy: "Well, I didn't do either, actually. but she deserved it, don't you think?"
Oz: "Nobody deserves mime, Buffy."
Buffy: "Oh, Kathy does. She deserves to be locked in an invisible box, and blown away by an imaginary wind, and..."
Oz: "Forced to wear a binding unitard?"
Buffy: "Yeah, the itchy kind. It's perfect."
Oz: "Just here to help."

Oz: "Just a thought, Buffy - do you think that all this ranting is scaring away potential demons?"
Buffy: "You're right. Ooh! She's even affecting my work now! She'd the Titanic. She's a crawling black cancer. (smashes bench) She's other really bad things."
Oz: "On the plus side, you killed the bench, which was looking shifty."

The Harsh Light Of Day

Devon: "That was, like, the best set ever. We'll do great in LA. We're gonna have them glued to their seats."
Willow: "Uh, Devon? Aren't they supposed to dance?"
Oz: "Well, we can glue them to the dance floor."
Devon: "I don't mean with real glue. You got that, right?"
Oz: "I got that."

Oz: "Remember Harmony?"
Willow: "She's back from her summer vacation. And she's a little different."
Buffy: "Different?"
Willow: "Paler."
Parker: "Is your neck okay?"
Buffy: "Neck. Paler. Puppy! The angry puppy."
Oz: "Yeah, we came to warn you about the... angry puppy."

Oz: "Devon dated her for a while, but she was too flaky for him, which, stop and marvel at the concept."
Buffy: "Guy dating Harmony dead. Must be, like, the most tolerant guy in the world."

Oz: "Okay, either I'm borrowing all your albums, or I'm moving in."
Giles: "Oz, there are more important things than records right now."
Oz: "More important than this one?"
Giles: "Um, I suppose an argument could be made for..."
Xander: "Whoa, Giles has a TV. Everybody, Giles has a TV! He's shallow like us."
Oz: "I got to admit, I'm a little disappointed."
Giles: "I-I-I..."
Willow: "Well, maybe it doesn't work. It's like art."
Giles: "Uh... public television!"

Fear, Itself

Xander: "I don't know - I was going for ferocious/scary, but it's coming out more dryly sardonic."
Willow: "It does appear to be mocking you with its eyeholes."
Oz: "Yeah, and its nosehole seems sad and full of self-loathing."

Xander: "People, prepare to have your spines tingled and your gooses bumped by the terrifying... Fantasia. Fantasia?"
Oz: "Maybe it's because of all the horrific things we've seen, but hippos wearing tutus just don't unnerve me the way they used to."

Buffy: "The scary house? Sounds kind of lame."
Oz: "It actually borders on fun."

"Laughs will be had by all."

Willow: "I'll know when I've reached my limit."
Oz: "Wine coolers?"
Buffy: "Magic."
Oz: "Ooh. Didn't encourage her, did you?"
Willow: "Where's supportive boyfriend guy?"
Oz: "Oh, he's picking up your dry-cleaning. But he told me to tell you he's afraid you're gonna get hurt."
Willow: "Okay, Brutus. (pause) Brutus. Uh, Caesar? Betrayal, trusted friend, back-stabby?"
Oz: "Oh, I'm with you on the reference, but..."

Oz: "But, just know that, whatever you decide, I'll back your play."
Buffy: "See? Concerned guy is sweet guy."

Frat Guy: "Thanks for the loan, man. Our sound system sucks."
Oz: "Mi Casio es su Casio."

Oz: "Oh, Xander's a civilian."
Frat Guy: "Ah, townie, huh? Didn't know. Looked so normal."

Xander: "Sensing a disturbance in the force, Master?"
Oz: "Oh, left speaker's crackling a little bit."
Xander: "And you feel stabbing it's the proper solution?"

Xander: (to Oz) "And you are?"
(Oz pulls back shirt to reveal name badge reading 'God'.)
Xander: "Of course. I wish I'd thought of that before I put down my deposit. I could've been God."
Oz: "Blasphemer."

Willow: "Eew! Cobweb. Okay, that part was realistic."
Oz: "Frat boys aren't too obsessive with their cleaning. Might not be decoration, per se."

Buffy: "Thank the lord."
Oz: "You're welcome."

"Cowering in a closet is starting to sound like a reasonable plan."

Beer Bad

Oz: "Hey, you got a table."
Willow: "I had to kill a man."
Oz: "Well, it's a really good table."

Wild At Heart

Willow: "The Bronze is more fun this year, isn't it?"
Buffy: "'Cause of the gloating factor alone, you know? We're all about college, now. We've got heady discourse."
Oz: "Yeah, curfew-free nights of mom and pop-less hootenanny."
Xander: "Co-ed dating prospects who find townies sexy and dangerous. What? I can dream."
Buffy: "Right. So if college is so great, what are we doing here and why is it more fun?"
Willow: "Because the Bronze is nice and familiar. It's like a big comfy blankie."
Oz: "Will, I was under the impression that I was your big comfy blankie."
Willow: "Aw, you're my person blankie. This is my place blankie."

Giles: "Splendid. Well, it's ages since I've been to a gig. Well, don't look that way. I'm... I'm... I'm down with the new music. And I have the albums to prove it."
Buffy: "Yes, but it's your cutting-edge 8-tracks that keep you ahead of the scene."
Oz: "Don't scoff, gang. I've seen Giles' collection. He was an animal in his day."
Giles: "Thank you."
Buffy: "Hey, why not? If the Stones can still keep rolling, why can't Giles?"

Willow: "They're good, aren't they?"
Oz: "Nothing special."
Buffy: "Yeah, she's quell Fiona. Color me bored."

Willow: "It's in the sandblaster."
Oz: "What's in the sandblaster, Will? It's a dream, come back to me."
Willow: "All geminis to the raspberry hats."
Oz: "Now you're faking."
Willow: "Am not. Just a little."

Oz: "Bad dream?"
Willow: "I guess. But the waking up part makes up for it."
Oz: "It's always so busy in there."
Willow: "Not always. A few things shut my brain up completely."
Oz: "Anything I can help you with?"

Oz: "I don't know about tonight, unless the extreme Jerry Garcia look turns you on."
Willow: "Huh?"

Willow: "There's this Wicca group on campus I wanted to check out. They have orientation on the three nights you're wolfy. And it's probably totally silly, but..."
Oz: "No, go. Show 'em how it's done."

Oz: "Big lunch?"
Veruca: "I like to eat. I hate chicks who are like, 'Does it have dressing on it?'"
Oz: "Agreed."

Veruca: "That was, um, some night."
Oz: "So it appears."

Oz: "So you're a..."
Veruca: "Werewolf groupie. Nobody else gets it done for me."

Veruca: "Now you... need to relax."
Oz: "Not a possibility."

Veruca: "God, the kids in this dorm need Fashion 101 in a big way. Or we could start right here at home."
Oz: "Not making a statement."

Veruca: "You have a cage?"
Oz: "Don't you?"
Veruca: "Oh, yeah. It has a little wheel with a plastic ball and a cute little bell in it. God! Somebody's domesticated the hell out of you."

Veruca: "Or maybe you just don't want to admit what happened to you. Maybe you just wanna pretend like you're a regular guy."
Oz: "Well, I am. I'm only a wolf three nights a month."
Veruca: "Or you're the wolf all the time. And this human face is just your disguise."

Oz: "New look."
Willow: "You, too."
Oz: "Oh. Laundry day kinda came and went."

Willow: "Guess it was just me worrying for nothing again. Me and my busy mind, always thinking, thinking, thinking."
Oz: "Well, now you can stop. Everything's fine."
Willow: "Maybe you could help me... stop. I'd really, really appreciate anything you could do."

Veruca: "So you're saying I should spend the whole night with you... alone. Locked in a cage."
Oz: "You'll be safe."
Veruca: "Not from you."

Oz: "She's like me. A wolf."
Willow: "Well, I knew you two had a lot in common, but..."

Oz: "Look, Buffy, you should know that--"
Buffy: "Oz, now might be a good time for your trademark stoicism."

Oz: "Veruca was right about something. The wolf is inside me all the time, and I don't know where that line is anymore between me and it. And until I figure out what that means, I shouldn't be around you... or anybody."
Willow: "Well, that could be a problem, 'cause people... kind of a planetary epidemic."

Willow: "Oz, don't you love me?"
Oz: "My whole life, I've never loved anything else."

New Moon Rising

Willow: "When did you get back?"
Oz: "Pretty much now."

Xander: "Oz, man. Hate to sound grandma, but... you don't call, you don't write." (Shakes his hand)
Oz: "Yeah. Sorry."

Oz: "I talked to Xander, and he said you didn't have a new guy."
Willow: "No. No new guy."

"A woman in Tibet traded it to me for the Radiohead record. Got a lot of mileage out of the barter system."

Oz: "This warlock in Romania sent me to the monks there to learn some meditation techniques. Very intense. All about keeping your inner cool."
Willow: "Good. 'Cause you were such a spaz before."

Willow: "So that's it? You keep your inner cool and no more wolfie?"

Willow: "Some of it, you know, was me telling myself I hated you, and cursing your name. Not literally."
Oz: "Well, thanks for that."

Willow: "Well, I believe a manly-sized breakfast is in order, don't you?"
Oz: "Or we could just... sleep a little while. Whatever you want."
Willow: "I'll have the less confusing waffles right now."

"Hey. I thought I smelt-- heard Willow."

"Is that her sweater?"

"Do you realise you have her smell all over you."

"Run."

Willow: "You stopped the wolf from coming out. I saw it."
Oz: "But I couldn't look at you. I mean, it turns out, the one thing that brings it out of me is you. Which falls under the heading of ironic in my book."
Willow: "It was my fault. I upset you."
Oz: "So, we're safe then, 'cause you'll never do that again."

Oz: "But you're happy?"
Willow: "I am. I can't explain it..."
Oz: "It may be safer for both of us if you don't."

Willow: "I feel like some part of me will always be waiting for you. Like if I'm old and blue-haired, and I turn the corner in Istanbul, and there you are, I won't be surprised... because you're with me, you know?"
Oz: "I know. But now is not that time, I guess."

Willow: "What are you gonna do?"
Oz: "I think I better take off."
Willow: "When?"
Oz: "Pretty much now."

Restless
Xander: "So, what you been doing? Doing spells? She does spells with Tara."
Oz: "Yeah, I heard about that."