-Isms - Season Three (Part 3) - Mayor Wilkins

Season Three

Mayor Wilkins

Bad Girls

Mayor Wilkins: "Where is the owner of these fine implements?"
Mr. Trick: "The common term is 'slain.'"

"Who knows, with any luck, they'll kill each other. Then everyone's a winner. Everyone, of course, meaning me."

"Gosh, but I'm feeling chipper! Who's for a root-beer?"

Consequences

Wilkins: "It's not working."
Mr. Trick: "It's supposed to do something besides shred?"
Mayor Wilkins: "It's supposed to cheer me up. Usually, using the shredder gives me a lift. It's fun."
Mr. Trick: "And today, you're not getting the ya-yas?"
Mayor Wilkins: "No. I guess it'll take more than this to turn my frown upside down."

"Do you think he was going to betray me? Oh, now, that's a horrible thought. And now he's dead, I'll never have the chance to scold him."

Mayor Wilkins: "Do you think he talked? To them?"
Mr. Trick: "If he did, I'm thinking he said the wrong thing."

"Well, this is exciting. A Slayer, up for murder one. That's sunshine and roses to me, it really is."

"Shh, here comes my favorite part. Where the Slayers see us in the hall together, thick as thieves. Oh, wait, we are thieves. And worse."

Faith: "You sent your boy to kill me."
Mayor Wilkins: "That's right, I did."
Faith: "He's dust."
Mayor Wilkins: "I thought he might be, what with you standing here and all."
Faith: "I guess that means you have a job opening."

Enemies



Mayor: "And what exactly did this demon look like?"
Faith: "Demonic."

"I like good, positive 'up' thoughts. If you failed me in that way, well, you know, replacing Mr. Trick was chore enough."

"There's nothing uncool about healthy teeth and bones."

Mayor: "I just don't understand what that boy could be thinking."
Faith: "Try Buffy Summers, like in a big fat one-track way."

Mayor: "So you couldn't give him that one moment of true happiness."
Faith: "I was thinking more along the lines of a long weekend, but okay."

"There's more than one way to skin a cat, and I happen to know that's factually true."

"Well, scheduling a man of your talents is quite the chore, I'll tell you. Between the chanting and the sacrifice, my golf game is shot."

"You're not much a people person, are you?"

Mayor: "Now, then, Angelus... may I call you Angel?"
Angel: "Well, actually, I'm thinking more along the lines of you calling me Master."

"You know, Angelus, attitude may get you attention, but courtesy wins respect."

Angel: "Had a soul. Now I'm free."
Mayor: "That's terrific! Poetic, too. Not that I read much poetry. Except for those little ones in the Reader's Digest. You know, some are quite catchy."

Angel: "Hey, I don't mean to rush things here, but are you trying to get to some kind of a point?"
Mayor: "Heh. Kids today. Rush, rush, rush."

Mayor: "I see you're admiring my letter opener."
Angel: "Well, actually, I was thinking of stabbing you through the heart with it."

Angel: "Hmm. Can't be killed, but you don't like germs."
Mayor: "Ew. Awful things, unsanitary."

Angel: "Well, gee, sir, I thought I'd find that Slayer that's giving you so much trouble and torture, maim, and kill her."
Mayor: "Fine. You know, it's nice to see you're not one of those slacker types running around town today."

Mayor: "Torture Buffy. Killing her's fine, just make it a slow one."
Angel: "My favorite kind."

(to Angel): "Uh... try to have her home by eleven."

"She's not a little girl anymore." (sniffles)

"Well, you win some, you lose some. From where I'm sitting, it's batting average that counts."

"Besides, you know, once the Ascension starts, the 'in crowd' you're so concerned about? Whoo! They'll be lucky if there's enough of them left to fill a pothole. I promise."

"Still unhappy? Hmm. Okey-doke. I've got two words that are gonna' make all the pain go away: miniature... golf."

Choices

"A package is arriving tomorrow night from Central America. Something - and I can't stress this enough - something crucially important to my ascension. Without it... well, what would tollhouse cookies be without the chocolate chips? A pretty darn big disappointment, I can tell you!"

"There - that look on your face is my reward."

Mayor Wilkins: "So, you just take good care of it. You be careful not to put somebody's eye out with that thing. 'Till I tell you to."
Faith: "Got any particular eyes in mind?"

Mayor Wilkins: "What happened to the courier? I was supposed to pay him."
Faith: "I made him an offer he couldn't survive."

Mayor Wilkins: "What?"
Faith: "Nothing."
Mayor Wilkins: "Oh, it's 'cause I used the "B" word, huh?"

"She deserves that poor excuse for a creature of the night."

"This is very unfortunate. I just had this conference room redecorated, for pete's sake. At taxpayers expense. And, oh, yeah... GAHH! They've got my box."

"A dog's friendship is stronger than reason, stronger than its own sense of self-preservation. Buffy's like a dog. And hey, before you can say 'Jack Robinson,' you'll get to see me kill her like one."

"Girls. I hope I don't have to separate you two. Faith, you can play with your new toy later."

"Well, this is exciting, isn't it? Clandestine meetings by dark of night, exchange of prisoners. I just, I... I feel like we should all be wearing trenchcoats."

Mayor Wilkins: "She's pretty, Angel. A little skinny. Still don't understand why it couldn't work out with you and my Faith. I guess you kinda just have strange tastes in women."
Angel: "Yeah, well, what can I say? I like 'em sane."

Graduation Day, Part 1

Mayor Wilkins: "And everything went smoothly with Mr. Worth?"
Faith: "Not if you're Mr. Worth."
Mayor Wilkins: "Well, that's swell."

Faith: "I feel wicked stupid in this."
Mayor Wilkins: "You look lovely. Perfect for the Ascension. Any boys that manage to survive will be lining up to ask you out."

"Nobody knows what you are. Not even you, little Miss Seen-it-all."

"Sunnydale owes you a debt. It will be repaid. Yes, sir, we'll mark that invoice 'Paid in full.'"

Mayor Wilkins: "'The several races of man will be as one in their terror and destruction.' Oh, that's kind of sweet. Different races coming together."
Buffy: "You never get even a little tired of hearing yourself speak, do you?"
Mayor Wilkins: "That's one spunky little girl you've raised. I'm gonna eat her."

"Whoa! Now, that was a little thoughtless. Violent outbursts like that, in front of the children."

"We don't knock during dark rituals?"

Graduation Day, Part 2

Mayor Wilkins: "Murderous little fiend. Did you see what she did to my Faith?"
Angel: "Hadn't made any plans to weep over that one."

"Well, looks like somebody's been eating his spinach."

Mayor Wilkins: "The show's not over, but there will be a short intermission. Don't want to miss the 2nd act. All kinds of excitement."
Angel: "I'll be there."

"The transformation should begin at exactly 3:28. I'll just be finishing my speech. You know, it's too bad you fellows are going to miss that because I think it speaks to every one of us. I mean, heck, I've been working on it for 100 years, it better be good."

"No snacking! I see blood on your lips and it's a visit to the wood shed for you boys."

"Remember, fast and brutal. It's gonna be a whole new world come nightfall, don't want to weaken now. And boys? Let's watch the swearing."

"Well. What a day this is. A special day. Today is our centennial. The 100th anniversary of the founding of Sunnydale. And I know what that means to all you kids. . .Not a darn thing."

"It has begun. My destiny. It's a little sooner than I expected. I had this whole section on civic pride. But I guess we'll just skip to the big finish."

"Well gosh!"

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