Giles: "Do you ignore everything I say as a rule?"
Buffy: "No, I believe that's your trick."

Buffy: "And you'll be stopping me how?"
Giles: "By appealing to your common sense, if such a creature exists."

"That's the thrill of living on the Hellmouth. There's a virtual cornucopia of fiends and devils and ghould to engage! Pardon me for seeing the glass half full."

"Yes, she's lovely in a common, extremely well-proportioned way."

"Whatever you do, it had better be sudden and swift. This beast is extremely dangerous."

Buffy: "Well, your buddy Carlyle faced it, and he's still around."
Giles: "Yes, in a straightjacket, howling his innards out day and night."
Buffy: "Okay, Admiral, way to inspire the troops."
Giles: "Sorry."

"Recording bat sonar is something soothingly akin to having one's teeth drilled."

Buffy: "See, this is a school, and we have students, and they check out books, and then they learn things."
Giles: "I was beginning to suspect that was a myth."

Giles: "I'll just jump in my time machine, go back to the twelfth century, and ask the vampires to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days while you take in dinner and a show."
Buffy: "Okay, at this point you're abusing sarcasm."

"She is the strangest girl."

"Buffy, when I said you could slay vampires and have a social life, I didn't mean at the same time."

"I had very definite plans about my future. I was going to be a fighter pilot. Or possibly a grocer."

Giles: "You just run along to class, while I wait for the feeling to return to my arms."

"It's devastating. He's turned into a sixteen-year-old boy. Of course you'll have to kill him."

Giles: "Testosterone is a great equalizer. It turns all men into morons. He will, however, get over it."
Buffy: "I can't believe you, of all people, are trying to Scully me!"

Willow: "How is it you always know this stuff? You always know what's going on. I never know what's going on."
Giles: "Well, you weren't here from midnight until six researching it."
Willow: "No, I was sleeping."

Miss Calendar: "You know, the last two years, more e-mail was sent than regular mail. More digitized information went across phone lines than conversations."
Giles: "That is a fact that I regard with genuine horror."

Giles: "I'll be back in the middle ages."
Miss Calendar: "Did you ever leave?"

"Those boys aren't sparklingly normal as it is."

"Things involving the computer fill me with a childlike terror. Now, if it were a nice ogre or some such, I'd be more in my element."

Xander: "What, I can't have information sometimes?"
Giles: "It's just somewhat unprecedented."

"What's in cyberspace at the moment is less than divine."

"If it's to last, then the getting of knowledge should be tangible. It should be, um, smelly."

"Oh. You three.

Giles: "...Our new fuhrer, Mr. Snyder.
Willow: "I think they call them Principals now.

"He thought it would behoove me to have more contact with the students. I did try to explain that my vocational choice of librarian was a deliberate attempt to minimize said contact...

"A vampire in love with a slayer. It's rather poetic...in a maudlin sort of way."

Giles: "There's an invisible girl terrorizing the school."
Angel: "That's not really my area of expertise."
Giles: "Nor mine, I'm afraid. It's fascinating, though. By all accounts, it's a wonderful power to possess."
Angel: "Oh, I don't know. Looking in the mirror every day and seeing nothing there...it's an overrated pleasure."

"We could talk to her. Perhaps reason with her. Or possibly grab her."