The Isms - Buffyisms

"To make you a vampire, they have to suck your blood, then you have to suck their blood. It's like a whole big sucking thing."

"Now, we can do this the hard way, or...well, actually, there's just the hard way."

"This is not gonna' be pretty. We're talkin' violence, strong language, adult content."

(to Giles):"Can you vague that up for me?

Willow: "Did we win?"
Buffy: "Well, we averted the apocalypse. I'll give us points for that."

"That much quality time with my mom would probably lead to some quality matricide."

"You're my friend! You're my Xander-shaped friend!"

"You're not like other boys at all. You are totally and completely one of the girls!"

"Destructo Girl, that's me."

"I'm not saying she craned her neck. We're talking full-on Exorcist twist."

"Bat sonar. Makes your whole nervous system go to hell. You can go there with it."

"Two points for the Slayer while the Watcher has yet to score!"

Buffy: "See, this is a school, and we have students, and they check out books, and then they learn things."
Giles: "I was beginning to suspect that was a myth."

Giles: "I'll just jump in my time machine, go back to the twelfth century, and ask the vampires to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days while you take in dinner and a show."
Buffy: "Okay, at this point you're abusing sarcasm."

Giles: "If your identity as a Slayer is revealed, it could put you and all those around you in grave danger."
Buffy: "Well, in that case, I won't wear my button that says, "I'm a Slayer, ask me how."

"A cranky Slayer is a careless Slayer."

"Clark Kent has a job. I just want to go on a date."

"If the Apocalypse comes, beep me."

Willow: "So, we're talking about a guy?"
Buffy: "Not exactly a guy. For us to have a conversation about a guy, there'd have to be a guy for us to have a conversation about. Was that a sentence?"

Willow: "What about Angel?"
Buffy: "Yeah, just see him in a relationship. 'Hi, honey. You're in grave danger. I'll see you next month!"

Buffy: "Angel, do you snore?"
Angel: "I don't know. It's been a long time since anyone's been in a position to let me know."

Xander: "Buffy, come on. Wake up and smell the seduction. It's the oldest trick in the book."
Buffy: "What, saving my life, getting slashed in the ribs?"
Xander: "Duh!"

"Cool, crossbow! Check out these babies. Goodbye, stakes! Hello, flying fatality!"

"'Hunk' can mean a lot of things, bad things!"

"'A' doesn't even stand for Angel, for that matter. It stands for Achmed, a charming foreign exchange student."

Buffy: "Can a vampire ever be a good person? Couldn't it happen?"
Giles: "A vampire isn't a person at all. It may have the movements, the memories, even the personality of the person it took over, but it's still a demon at the core. There is no halfway."
Willow: "So that'd be a no, huh?"

"You are a thing of evil for not telling me this right away."

"So, you've been seeing a guy, but you don't know what he looks like. Okay, this is a puzzle. No, wait, I'm good at these. Does it involve a midget and a block of ice?"

Buffy:"This guy could be anybody. He could be weird or crazy or old or...he could be a circus freak--he's probably a circus freak!"
Xander: "Yeah, I mean we read about it all the time. You know, people meet on the net, they talk, they get together, have dinner, a show...horrible axe murder."
Buffy: "Willow, axe murdered by a circus freak!"

"He's boyfriendly?"

"Wow, I had knowledge!"

Buffy: "My spider sense is tingling."
Giles: "Your...spider sense?"
Buffy: "Pop culture reference. Sorry."

Miss Calendar: "You're here again? You kids really dig the library, don't you?"
Buffy: "We're literary."
Xander: "To read makes our speaking English good."

Buffy: "Tell me the truth. How's my hair?"
Xander: "It's great. It's your best hair ever."

"Okay, so a powerful demon with horns is walking around Sunnydale, and nobody's noticed?"

"So much for 'delete file'."

(to Giles)"Here's a tip: hurry!"

Willow: "I think dummies are cute. You don't?
Buffy: "Eww. They give me the wig. Ever since I was little.
Willow: "What happened?
Buffy: "I saw a dummy, it gave me the wig. There really wasn't a story there.

"You might want to consider getting some new shtick, unless you want your prop ending up as a duraflame log.

Buffy: "What am I gonna do, slay vampires on stage?
Willow: "Maybe in a funny way.

"Look, Mom, if you really love me, and want to show your support, you'll stay away... far away.

"Okay, everyone look at me like I'm in a bunny suit, 'cause that's how stupid I feel saying this.

"Whoever's out there, I'm going to hurt you! Badly! If you'll just give me a minute.

Buffy: "Could I be seeing Billy's asteroid body?"
Giles: "Astral body, and I don't know."

Buffy: "What am I, Knowledge Girl now? Explanations are your terrain."

"I don't see the ugly man. I also don't know where the sun and the rest of the world went."

Buffy: "And monsters don't usually send messages. It's pretty much crush, kill, destroy. This was different.
Giles: "I'd have to say you're right."
Buffy: "I love it when he says that!"

Cordelia: "I don't think I need the loony fringe vote."
Buffy: "Well...I don't even like chocolates. Okay, that was the lamest comeback of our times."

"Okay, can we have the heartfelt talk with a little less talk from you?"

"You know, I really felt sorry for you. You've suffered. There's one thing I really didn't factor into all this: you're a thundering loony!"

"Do you know that you guys are very creepy?"

Buffy: "Giles, care. I'm putting my life on the line battling the undead. Look, I broke a nail, okay? I'm wearing a press-on. The least you could is exhibit some casual interest. You could go, 'hmm?'"
Giles: "Hmm?"

Buffy: "I can't put it off any longer. I have to meet my terrible fate."
Giles: "What?"
Buffy: "Biology."

"You and me, a mother/daughter thing. We could talk about all the embarrassing things you love to bring up."
"You know, for someone who's all-powerful, you sure do like to hide."

"oh,look, a bad guy."

"Save that hypnosis crap for the tourists."

Master: "Where are your jibes now? Will you laugh when my hell is on earth?"
Buffy: "You're that amped about Hell? Go there!"