Season One

City Of...

"She was a really, really pretty girl. No, she was a hottie girl."

"Heh. Girls are nice."

"'Scuse me. I'm sorry. Has anyone seen my car? It's big and shiny."

Doyle: "I've been sent. By the Powers That Be."
Angel: "Powers that be what?"

Angel: "Why would a woman I've never met even talk to me?"
Doyle: "Have you looked in a mirror lately? I guess... you really haven't. No."

"I'm not good with people."

"Sure is a cute little..... doggie."

Angel: "So, uh, are you.... happy?"
Tina: "What?"
Angel: "You looked sort of down."
Tina: "You've been watching me?"
Angel: "No, I just.... I was... uh... looking towards there. And you walked.... through there."
Tina: "You don't hit on girls very often, do you?"

"Wow. I suddenly feel underdressed."

Angel: "Where's home?"
Tina: "Missoula, Montana. You've been to Missoula?"
Angel: "During the Depression. Uh, my depression. I was depressed there."

Agent: "You are a beautiful, beautiful man."
Angel: "Thanks."
Agent: "You're an actor."
Angel: "No."
Agent: "That wasn't a question. I'm Oliver. Ask anyone about Oliver. They'll tell you I'm a fierce animal. I'm your manager as soon as you call."
Angel: "I'm not an actor."
Agent: "Funny. I like the humor. I like the whole thing. Call me. This isn't a come on. I'm in a very serious relationship with a landscape architect."

Cordelia: "So, um, are you still.... "GRRR"?"
Angel: "Yeah, there's not actually a cure for that."
Cordelia: "Well, I better get mingling. I really should be talking to people that *are* somebody. But it was fun!"
Angel: "It's nice that she's grown as a person."

Stacey: "You know what? I don't think you're gonna pull that trigger."
(Angel punches him in the face, hard)
Angel: "Good call."

Angel: "I made some tea. "
Tina: "Thanks."
Angel: "You take milk or sugar?"
Tina: "Yeah."
Angel: "'Cause... I don't have those things."

Doyle: "You can't cut yourself off."
Angel: "Doyle, I don't want to share my feelings. I don't want to open up. I wanna find the guy that killed Tina, and I wanna look him in the eye."
Doyle: "Then what?"
Angel: "Then I'm gonna share my feelings."

Stacey: "You have no idea who you're dealing with here."
Angel: "Russell? Let me guess. Not big on the daylight or the mirrors, drinks a lot of V-8?"

Doyle: "Wow, you're really going to war here. I guess you've seen a few in your time, yeah?"
Angel: "14. Not including Vietnam. They never declared it. "

Doyle: "Well, listen, best of luck to ya man. I've got some fairly large coin riding on the Vikings tonight, but I'll be there with you in spirit, yeah?"
Angel: "You're driving."
Doyle: "Wait a minute! No, no! I'm not combat ready, man. I'm just the messenger!"
Angel: "And I'm the message."

Russell: "Angel. We do things a certain way in L.A."
Angel: "Well, I'm new here."
Russell: "But you're a civilized man. We don't have to go around attacking each other. Look at me. I pay my taxes. I keep my name out of the paper. And I don't make waves. And in return, I can do anything I want."
Angel: "Really? Can you fly? "
(Angel kicks the chair he is sitting on and Russell flies through the window where he plummets to his death)
Angel: "Guess not."

Doyle: "What happened to Russell?"
Angel: "He went into the light."
Doyle: "Yet, you don't seem to be in a celebrating mood."
Angel: I killed a vampire. Didn't help anyone."
Doyle: "You sure about that? Cuz there's a girl upstairs who's as happy as can be. "

Angel: "You want to charge people?"
Cordelia: "Well not everybody, but sooner or later we are going to have to help some rich people, right?"

Doyle: "You know, there's a lot of people in this city that need helping."
Angel: "So I noticed."
Doyle: "You game?"
Angel: "I'm game."

Lonely Hearts

In The Dark

Angel: Oz.
Oz: Angel.
Angel: Nice surprise.
Oz: Thanks.
Angel: Staying long?
Oz: Few days.
Doyle: They always like this?
Oz: No, we're usually laconic.

Angel: Might as well go home, Spike. The Gem of Amara stays with me.
Spike: Why? Cuz you're Angel, Vamp Detective now? Ooo. I'm so scared. What's next? Vampire cowboy? Vampire fireman? Oh! Vampire ballerina!
Angel: I do like to work with my legs.

Angel: So, you and I duke it out, huh. This your big strategy for getting the ring back?
Spike: I had a plan.
Angel: You? A plan?
Spike: A good plan. Carefully laid out. But I got bored. All that watching, waiting. My legs started to cramp. I hate to quip. Just tell me where the damn ring is.
Angel: It wouldn't go with your outfit.

Angel: You think you can come to my town and pull this crap? You never learn Spike.
Spike: I may be a slow learner, but eventually I catch on.

Are you going to torture me, or just bore me to death?

Marcus: What do you want, Angel?
Angel: House in the country. A good pair of running shoes you can also wear out to dinner.

Angel: You hired a vampire. What do you think he's going to do with the ring when he finds it? Hand it over to you?
Spike: Oh! Good lord! Why didn't I think of ... oh, half a mo... I did!

Spike: Speaking of little Buff. I ran into her recently. Your name didn't come up. Although, she has been awful busy jumping the bones of the very first lunkhead who came long. Good looking fellow. Used her shamelessly. She is *cute* when she's hurting, isn't she?
Angel: She's cuter when she's kicking your ass.

Marcus: What are you planning to do? Kill me?
Angel: Well, after all, I promised.

You never cracked me, Marcus. You tried, but you failed. Now that.... that's gotta be torture.

Angel: Thanks for the help, man. You were key.
Oz: You're.... incredibly pale.

Doyle: So, how long's it been between sunsets?
Angel: 200 years, give or take.

Doyle: It is spectacular, I know, but I do promise there will be another one just like it again tomorrow.
Angel: Not for me.
Doyle: What are you saying, that the city's going to get hit by a meteor before tomorrow night? No, no, it's too horrible to say. I can't even bring myself to say the other...
Angel: I'm not gonna wear the ring.
Doyle: That was the other.

Doyle: You got a real addiction to the brooding part of life, did anyone ever tell ya that?
Angel: Once or twice.

I was brought back for a reason, Doyle. And as much as I'd like to kid myself, I don't think it was for 18 holes at Rancho.

I don't know about you, but I had a nice day. You know, except for the bulk of it where I was nearly tortured to death.

I Fall To Pieces

Angel: What is this?
Cordelia: Last week's coffee. Think of it as... espresso!
Angel: I think my esophagus is melting.

Angel: I'm not comfortable asking people for money.
Cordelia: Then get over it!
(Angel gives her a look)
Cordelia: I mean that in sensitive way.

Angel: Am I intimidating? I mean, do I put people off?
Cordelia: Well, as vampires go, you're pretty cuddly. Maybe you might want to think about mixing up the black-on-black look.

Cordelia: She's coming in.
Angel: I gotta change my shirt.

Cordelia: What is stalking nowadays, like, the third most popular sport among men?
Angel: Fourth, after luge.

Cordelia: Did you steal this book?
Angel: Yeah.
Cordelia: Good.

Kate: Who is this guy, Houdini?
Angel: Something like that.

Cordelia: What if he comes apart on you?
Angel: He comes apart on me... he's gonna stay that way.

Angel: He's in 12 steel boxes buried in 20 cubic feet of concrete in L.A.'s newest subway stop.
Doyle: That ought to bring in the tourists.

Melissa: I brought this for you guys. (She hands Angel a plant)
Angel: Hope it doesn't need light.

Cordelia: *cough*cough*cough*
Doyle: *ahem*
Angel: Uh, um, it's...
Melissa: What?
Angel: There's, uh, a bill?
Melissa: Bill who?
Angel: A bill... for my services.

Doyle: Let's march down to the bank right now and deposit this beauty.
Angel: You guys go on. I think I'll stay here and not burst into flames.
Doyle: Oh, right, you're pretty much the night deposit guy.

Rm W/A Vu

Doyle: Tell me stuff.
Angel: What stuff?
Doyle: About Cordelia.
Angel: Well, I know she can't type or file. 'Til today I had some hope regarding the phone.

Doyle: Who's Aura?
Angel: I think she's one of Cordelia's group. People called them the Cordettes. A bunch of girls from wealthy families. They ruled the high school, decided what was in, who was popular. It's like the Soviet Secret Police if they cared a lot about shoes.

Cordelia: You ever get that feeling like you just can't shower enough. Like something's happened and you'll never be clean?
Angel: You got peanut butter on the bed.

Doyle: It's a system of checks and balances.
Angel: And some of your checks didn't balance.

Angel: We all have problems. It's about priorities. And at the moment, I have a bigger one than you do.
Doyle: Bigger than a Kaliph demon?
Angel: Much. I'm thinking you could help me with mine, and maybe I could help you with yours.
Doyle: Oh, I don't know. I mean, what's your problem exactly? Cuz, you know, vampire business is . . .
Cordelia: *ahem* Hi! I was just wondering if you have any linoleum glue. For... if it ... started curling up all over.
Angel: I'll be there in a minute.
Cordelia: Okay.
Angel: Find her an apartment, and I'll deal with your demon.

Angel: My name's Angel. What's yours?
Demon: Screw you.
Angel: (Hurts the demon) My name's Angel. What's yours?
Demon: ...
Angel: (Hurts the demon again) My name's Angel. What's yours?
Demon: Griff.

Good meeting.

Doyle: I have to pay? Man, I shoulda just handled this myself. I don't have the money. And you can't get blood out of a stone.
Angel: You can get blood out of you.

Cordelia: Oh that's right, you can't come in.
Angel: [Walks in]
Cordelia: Wait, what about the rule?
Angel: You said when you got a place I was completely invited over.
Cordelia: What? I didn't even have a place then!

Angel: This is nice. How about a tour?
Cordelia: Uh huh, this is the kitchen, living room, I'm gonna knock out that wall, and that's about it. Hey, thanks for the cactus.

Kate: Now you're talking like a detective.
Angel: I am a detective.
Kate: Well, see, the thing about detectives is they have resumes and business licenses and last names. Pop stars and popes, those are the one-named guys.
Angel: You got me. I'm a pope.

Angel: Sooner or later I'm gonna need to hear it.
Doyle: What?
Angel: The story of your life.
Doyle: Ah, and quite a tale it is, too. Full of ribald adventures and beautiful damsels with loose morals.
Angel: Doyle.
Doyle: I will. Just give me time. The past, don't let go does she.
Angel: She never does.

Sense and Sensitivity

Angel: It's about time!
Doyle: Not a lot of enchanted swordsmiths open on Sunday.

Angel: So there is a point?
Cordelia: Being that it is possible to brood and show a little interest in the feelings of others.
Doyle: Oh, she thinks you're insensitive and, not to bring up the irony, but consider the source.
Angel: So I'm a little reserved, doesn't mean I don't care.
Cordelia: It's as if you don't have a pulse.
Angel: I don't.

Angel: Cordelia, I wanted to, you know, thank you... so much for going through the coroner's reports because.... I can imagine how not fun it is to read about, you know, coroner stuff.
Cordelia: Lame.

Angel: Hi! This is exciting isn't it? I just love a boat trip.
Little Tony: Who's the mook?
Angel: Herb Saunders from Baltimore!

It's the hat wasn't it? I knew the hat was too much.

Angel: I think Papasian's taken a contract out on you.
Kate: Wow, he's really acting out isn't he?
Angel: Well, yeah. He wants you dead.
Kate: I get that. I'm just saying he must be in some kind of pain to have to strike out at others in that way.
Angel: Are you okay?

Kate: Boy, I'm scared. And excited. And consumed with dread. I'm glad you're here.
Angel: I doubt even one of Little Tony's hired guns will try something in a room full of cops.
Kate: What? Oh you mean that death threat hanging overhead. No, I meant speaking in public.
Angel: What's that old saw? Picture your audience in their underwear?
Kate: [looks him up and down] Way ahead of you.

Angel: Which demon do you worship? Which one gives you power?
Sensitivity Guy: A whole bunch, actually. I'm a polytheist.

Sensitivity Guy: What were your parents like?
Angel: My parents were great. Tasted a lot like chicken.

Angel: Okay, I think someone needs a hug!
Cordelia: Uh, ew! Ew!

Cordelia: Hey! What's your damage?!
Doyle: I think we just found Mr. Sensitivity.
Angel: Mmm. He was right in here all the time, just waiting to come out. Gosh, what our folks do to us, huh?

Angel: The talking stick is cursed all right.
Cordelia: There's a stick that talks?

Cordelia, do you have any idea how precious you are?

He admitted it to me after I [sigh] threatened him with physical violence.

Angel: It'll wear off.
Cordelia: Soon?!

Doyle: So there was never any contract on Detective Lockley?
Angel: No, Little Tony's plan all along was to kill her himself. Poor guy.
Cordelia: Poor guy?!
Angel: Well, he's got issues.

Doyle: Angel, come on. You've got to snap out of this.
Cordelia: Right now. It's time for you to get all vampy and... GRRR! Kate needs you!
Angel: I don't want to. You both withdraw when I go vamp. I feel you judge me.
Cordelia: We won't judge you. Will we? Give it a try.
Angel: Closeness is too important to me right now.

Angel: Wow. That's vandalism.
Doyle: Ah, we'll take care of it later.
Angel: We should leave a note.

Cordelia: Would you come on!
Angel: What's the magic word?
Cordelia: Ugh!
Angel: No, I don't think "Ugh" is the magic word, if one would call it a word and even then certainly not a magic one.
Cordelia: We don't have time for this.
Angel: There's always time to be considerate of others, Cordelia.
Cordelia: Oh please.
Angel: See, wasn't so hard, now, was it?

Hey! I'm feeling some serious negative energy in this room.

Now, why don't we all just sit down together and process this.

Okay, now I'm feeling unheard.

You know, Anthony, you can be a rainbow and not a pain-bow.

Kate: You!
Angel: No, you!

The Bachelor Party

This isn't a spelling bee. Nobody expects you to play fair.

Richard: You left out the part about him being such a handsome fellow.
Angel: I'm not . . .
Richard: Oh, you are. Really.
Angel: I'm not Doyle. He is.
Richard: Oh, that's more like it.

Doyle: I can't go trailing after her intended myself. It just wouldn't look right. Angel, you think you would. . . .
Angel: Yeah. Just don't tell Cordelia. She'll want to charge you.

Harry: Stop!
Angel: He's a demon!
Harry: Well, yeah!

Angel: They gave up those orthodox teachings, language, around the turn of the century. Now they own a number of restaurants with pretty expensive windows.
Doyle: I fully intend to chip in for that.

Richard: Angel! Hey, this is a surprise.
Angel: Yeah, I thought I'd use the door this time.

Angel: Where are you?
Cordelia: In the netherworld known as the 818 area code.

Angel: Party's over.
Brother #1: You brought a vampire to my brother's bachelor party?!

Okay. I think you've cheered us up enough.

I Will Always Remember You

Doyle: (indicating stake) Why don't you let me have that?
Angel: Because I need it to level my desk. The floor's uneven.

Angel: I didn't want to stir things up.
Cordelia: You don't want to stir, but if my ex came to town and was all stalking me in the shadows and then left and then he didn't even say hello, I'd be . .
Buffy: A little upset. Wouldn't you?

Angel: It's complicated how this all happened, Buffy, you know. It's kind of a long story.
Buffy: Your new sidekick had a vision, I was in it, you came to Sunnydale?
Angel: Okay, maybe not that long.

Buffy: You didn't feel that I was important enough to even tell me that you were there.
Angel: I'm trying to explain. It's because I felt you were important that I didn't tell you.

Buffy: I don't need you skulking around, trying to protect me . . . unless, of course, I'm in some gigantic fight to the death, which I was last night. That was you helping me, wasn't it?
Angel: I was in the neighborhood. Skulking.

Buffy: I just know that when you're around, whether I see you or not, I feel you. Inside. And it throws me.
Angel: It throws me, too.

Buffy: Friend of yours?
Angel: Never saw it before.
Buffy: It was rude. We should go kill it.
Angel: I'm free.

Buffy: It's a lot handier than your fightin' ax.
Angel: Unless it chops them in two and maybe takes some of your hand with it.

Buffy: Angel? You okay?
Angel: I feel weird.

Angel: No, I meant I felt weird from the demon's blood It's powerful.
Buffy: O-kay. Let's just rewind Buffy's little outburst and pretend it never happened.

I'm alive!

Angel: Some of its blood mixed with mine.
Doyle: And you wound up with a pulse.

Angel: Ugh, my back. It hurts. Everything's...
Doyle: More real? Now that you're real?

I'm a mortal now. I have a mortal body, and . . . . I'm *so* HUNGRY!

Angel: You know, I'd forgotten how good it all tastes when you're alive.
Cordelia: Yeah, they didn't even have cookie dough fudge mint chip in your day.
Angel: Oh! I want some. Can you get that?
Cordelia: It'll go straight to your thighs.

I love chocolate! (gulp) Ugh, yech. But not, as it turns out, yogurt.

Now my stomach's killing me.

Angel: The gateway for lost souls . . . is under the post office?
Doyle: Makes sense if you think about it.

Angel: I'm sorry I kissed you like that.
Buffy: You are?
Angel: Not for the kiss itself.

I think maybe we'd be asking for trouble rushing back into things. Not that I don't want to rush. I do. Believe me.

It would be smart to wait a while. See if this mortal thing takes.

Angel: You're still the Slayer. And I'm not sure what I am now. I don't even know what my purpose is. I can't just wedge myself into your life back in Sunnydale. I wouldn't be good for either of us. Not to mention the fact that you just started college. And what about Slaying? I mean, if you had me to worry about, you might not be as focused.
Buffy: Are you gonna pull out a pie chart on me now?

Angel: We stay in touch, just not . . .
Buffy: Literally.

God, I love food.

Why did you never tell me about chocolate and peanut butter?

Angel: Agh, okay, mortal coordination leaving something to be desired.
Buffy: Wrong, it's just right.

Buffy: That's a good sound. Thump thump, thump thump.
Angel: It feels pretty amazing.

Buffy: I'm so sleepy. But I still want . . .
Angel: What? You couldn't possibly . . .

Buffy: No, I'm spent. Pleasantly numb even. You?
Angel: For now.

Buffy: No, I want to stay awake so that this day can keep happening.
Angel: Sleep. We'll make another one like it tomorrow.

Demon: What do you think of the great warrior now?
Angel: Little bland, needs salt.

Buffy: So, what, you just took a whole 24 hours to weigh the ups and downs of being a regular Joe and decided it was more fun being a super hero?
Angel: You know that's not it. How can we be together if the cost is your life or the lives of others?

I couldn't tell you. I wasn't sure I could do it if I woke up with you one more morning.

Buffy: So, then let's just stick to the plan. Keep our distance until time has passed. Given enough time, we should be able to . . .
Angel: Forget?

Hero

Cordelia: Okay, we fade up on an aerial shot -- downtown, skyscrapers, lights, yadda yadda yadda. We hear a narrator -- preferably famous, maybe that bald Star Trek guy or one of the cheaper Baldwin brothers -- and he says, "It's a big, bad city out there." Cut to a woman walking down a dark, spooky street -- alone. We'll cast some beautiful, young actress -- maybe an up-and-coming starlet whose career is on the verge of taking off. Anyway, she's all nervous, right? Mucho vulnerable. The voice guy says, "Danger lurks around every corner." She's attacked by big, ugly goon -- with a knife! She screams, "Help! Is there no one to help me?" "Well, now there's someone who'll answer your call. He'll protect you. Catch you when you fall. You can count on it."
(Angel in the commercial): "And you can count on me. Because I'm the Dark Avenger."
Angel: I'm the what?

Buffy and I were together until we realized it couldn't be. We don't belong to ourselves. We belong in the world, fighting.

Doyle: You had the one thing you've wanted in your unnaturally long life, and you gave it back?
Angel: Maybe I was wrong.
Doyle: Or maybe Cordelia was right about you being the real deal in the hero department. See, I would have chosen the pleasures of the flesh over duty and honor any day of the week. I just don't have that strength.
Angel: You never know your strength until you're tested.

The Oracles said something very bad is coming. Soldiers of darkness ushering in the End of Days kind of bad.

Harbor Master: I could get into a hell of a lot of trouble doing this.
Angel: Not as much as if you don't.

Angel: Big Randy told you about me, right? What I am?
Harbor Master: He told me you bit him.
Angel: Oh, I didn't bite him.
Harbor Master: So you don't...
Angel: I wasn't hungry.

Angel: No one looks inside that ship or tries to stop it from leaving port. If they do, I'm going to be feeling it's your fault. Then look for me to get a little bit peckish.
Harbor Master: (stamp) Have a nice trip.

Scourge Leader: You lied to us, half-breed.
Angel: You catch on quick, football head.

Scourge Leader: Soon only the pure will be left standing.
Angel: Actually, Pure Boy, you'll be on your ass.

Parting Gifts

Angel: What are you looking for?
Cordelia: Nothing. (pause) Doyle's special coffee mug.
Angel: Doyle didn't have a special mug.

Angel: Cordelia . . . get out.
Cordelia: What?
Angel: I mean of the office. Take the day off.

Barney: First off, you should know -- right away, before there's any misunderstanding -- I'm a demon.
Angel: Appreciate your candor.

Barney: I just realized it's 3:45 in the afternoon. Middle of the day. If you're a vampire, why aren't you in your coffin?
Angel: A coffin. I hate that stereotype. You're a demon and you don't know anything about vampires?
Barney: Only what I learned from TV.
Angel: Vampires don't sleep in coffins. It's a misconception made popular by hack writers and ignorant media. In fact, you know, we can and do move around during the day, as long as we avoid direct sunlight. ‘K? Got it?

Angel: So you're a cheat.
Barney: I choose to think of it as going with my strengths.

Angel: You're my link to The Powers That Be.
Cordelia: I am nobody's link to anything. I lost control of my entire central nervous system. And I'm not sure, but I may have drooled a little. At my first audition in weeks!
Angel: What was it?
Cordelia: Uh, Stain-Be-Gone. It was a national, no less. They'll probably never call me again.
Angel: The vision! What was the vision?
Cordelia: Oh, pfft, who knows. It was a thing.
Angel: A thing?
Cordelia: An ugly, grey, blobby thing. What difference does it make?
Angel: The difference is if you saw it in a vision, this could be an ugly, grey, blobby dangerous thing.

Behave yourself. I don't want to find you two necking on the couch when I get back.

Wesley: I'll wager you never thought you'd see me again.
Angel: To tell you the truth, I haven't given it much thought one way or another.

Angel: Interesting look for you. Motorcycle? Watcher's Council trying out a new image?
Wesley: In point of fact, I no longer work for the Council. I came to the conclusion I was of greater good to the cause working autonomously.
Angel: They fired you.

I had someone by my side. He's dead now. I'm not gonna let that happen again. I work alone.

Wesley: If anything happens to Cordelia because of me . . .
Angel: Nothing's gonna happen to Cordelia. I won't allow it.

In case you're wondering, this is me looking for clues. Feel free to join in any time you want.

Cordelia: I never doubted for a minute you'd find me.
Angel: Well, I was lucky. I had a Rogue Demon Hunter on my side.
Cordelia: Not that he didn't have it coming. He was a horrible evil monster.
Angel: He did kill a lot of people.
Wesley: Viciously mutilated their corpses.
Cordelia: Plus he started the bidding on me at a paltry $2,000.

Somnambulist

Angel: I'm not gonna hurt you.

Wesley: Why should we believe a word you say?
Angel: That's how fast I could take you if I wanted to.

Cordelia, I think that's tight enough.

Cordelia: Okay, well, pleasant... I mean, sleep tight.
Angel: That's pretty much a given.

Angelus: When they invite you in, savor it, Penn. You'll not recapture the moment. Family blood is always the sweetest.

Angel: I taught him well.
Cordelia: A real Psycho-Wan Kenobi.

Wesley: If he knows you're here, that might explain the dreams.
Angel: No, I used to have a connection with those I sired. It just means he's close, that's all.

Wesley: So, I take it you told her everything.
Angel: Just enough to get her killed.

Wesley: Where'd you get the police radio?
Angel: Police car.
Wesley: Oh dear!

Penn: We were to meet in Italy, remember?
Angel: I remember.
Penn: Well, I waited. Hell, I waited until the 19th century. What happened?
Angel: I got held up in Romania.
Penn: Romania. What's in Romania?
Angel: Gypsies.

Penn: Join me for a drink.
Angel: That's not why I'm here.
Penn: Why are you here?
Angel: To kill you.

Angel: Get me a stake.
Cordelia: It's like 8 in the morning. Oh!

Angel: I'm sorry what I did to you, Penn, what I turned you into.
Penn: A first class killer? A bold re-interpreter of the form?
Angel: Try cheesy hack. Look at you. You've been getting back at your father for over 200 years. It's pathetic and cliched. You've probably got a killer shrine on your wall. News clippings, magazine articles, maybe a few candles. Oh, you are so prosaic.

Penn: You're my real father, Angelus.
Angel: Fine. You're grounded.

Angel: I was just thinking about how much this place is like where I grew up.
Cordelia: Right. Yeah. I can see that, except for the cars and the buildings and the, you know, everything else.

Angel: I wonder if anything ever really changes.
Cordelia: Sure it does. They do. You have. They were just dreams, Angel. They weren't even your dreams. They didn't mean anything.
Angel: But I enjoyed it.
Cordelia: It'd probably be okay if you never mentioned that part ever again.
Angel: It's still in me, Cordelia.
Cordelia: Sure it's in you -- we all have something. But it's not the only thing that's in you. You're not him, Angel. Not anymore. The name I got in my vision? The message didn't come for Angelus; it came for you. Angel. And you have to trust that whoever The Powers That Be...be...are...is, anyway, they know the difference.

Cordelia: People really do change.
Angel: Yes, they do. Sometimes they change back. The day ever comes that I...
Cordelia: Oh, I'll kill you dead.
Angel: Thanks.
Cordelia: What are friends for?

Expecting

Angel: You look nice.
Cordelia: Aagh! Oh, and now, I look like the Joker.
Angel: Sorry.
Cordelia: Hopefully, I'm still too young and carefree for a heart attack. Would it kill you to hum a little tune when slipping up on people?
Angel: I don't hum.

Maybe we could be a little less young and carefree with the filing?

Angel: Okay, so, why is Mrs. Benson filed under 'F'?
Cordelia: Because she's from France. Remember what a pain she was?
Angel: Yeah, made me want to drink a lot.
Cordelia: Well, that's the French for you.

We seem to be evil-free at the moment.

Angel: So, that client I'm supposed to be meeting tonight, what's he like again?
Cordelia: Like a big baby, hatching from a big egg, with really large hands in need of a manicure.

That's right. Termites lay their eggs anywhere, such as *next door.* And we fight termites -- wherever they may roam.

Wesley: That was bracing.
Angel: Yeah. Baby just hatched. Wouldn't want to run into him when he grows up and gets his driver's license.

Wesley: Nobody's more fond of Cordelia than I, but if she wants to go gad-abouting with those doxies . . .
Angel: I think they liked you.
Wesley: Really? I didn't mean doxy in a sexually promiscuous sense, exactly. You don't think sticking the ax in the wall put them off?
Angel: That was charming.
Wesley: What about the fact they thought we were gay?
Angel: Adds mystery.

Bartender: I didn't see you.
Angel: I get that a lot.

Bartender: So, you're the boyfriend?
Angel: No. I'm family.

[Cordelia guzzles blood from Angel's fridge. Eww!]
Angel: I don't think I've ever realized just how disgusting that was.

Wilson: This is a private club. Featured word: Private.
Angel: You don't talk to me, I'll kick your ass. Featured word: Ass.

Wilson: Angel, right? The boss? She told me all about you.
[Angel disarms him, grabs him in a choke hold.]
Angel: Somehow, I doubt that.

Wilson: I'm not telling you anything.
Angel: I was so hoping you'd say that. [Angel gives him a bashing]

Angel: How else would losers like you get ahead? You'd have to become procreative surrogates for a vile demonic entity.
Jason: Well, mostly, I do it for the sex.

I really hate it when people shoot me.

Sorry I'm late to the baby shower. Brought a little gift.

Wesley: If you need more time, Angel can manage. I've been helping out a little, and . . . someone forgot to close the filter again.
Angel: Of course, if you're ready to come back. . . .

Cordelia: I learned something, too. I learned, um, men are evil? Oh, wait. I knew that. I learned that LA is full of self-serving phonies. Nope. Had that one down, too. Sex is bad?
Angel: We all knew that.

She

Cordelia: Hi! You having fun?
Angel: Sure. This is, uh. . . .
Cordelia: Your idea of hell.
Angel: Actually, in hell you tend to know a lot of the people.

I don't dance.

[A chair pulls out] Hi, Dennis. How ya doin'? [Beer floats over and opens] Still dead? (sips his drink) I know the feeling.

I got two modes with people: bite and avoid. Hard to shift.

Angel: The quiet, reserved thing -- don't you think that makes me kind of, I don't know, cool?
Cordelia: He was cooler.
Wesley: Good morning!
Angel: Now I'm depressed.

Captain Inferno, I presume? That's close enough. I don't do well near an open flame.

I'm not a big talker; I usually let others carry the conversation. I am pretty good at putting these [indicates crowbar] through heads though.

Angel (on mobile phone): Did she care for me?
Cordelia: Did she Carrie you -- Carrie. . . like the movie? You know!

(still on mobile phone): I can hear you now. These things were definitely cooked up by a bored warlock.

Angel (on mobile phone): She was very . . . attractive, for a demon.
Cordelia: A hottie, huh? I guess she's that all right. What with the sizzle.
Angel: The Sizzler?

On the left one spies the painter himself; in the middle distance is the French poet and critic Baudelaire, a friend of the artist. Now, Baudelaire -- interesting fellow. In his poem *Le Vampire* he wrote: //Thou who abruptly as knife did come to my heart.// He strongly believed that evil forces surrounded mankind. And some even speculated that the poem was about a real vampire. Oh, and Baudelaire is actually a little taller and a lot drunker than he's depicted here.

I'm guessing the Royal family isn't loving the portal-jumping, refugee-aiding duties you've assigned yourself.

Here's the plan: We go in. I start hitting people hard in the face, see where it takes us.

Guy: And which dimension are you from, brother?
Angel: You don't want to know.

Tay: You don't understand our ways, human.
Angel: No, I don't. (morphs into his game face) And I'm not human.

Angel: Sorry! I had a little....
Cordelia: Mushing didn't work out so great, huh?

I've Got You Under My Skin

Wesley: A knife with that mark is the only way to kill a Kek demon. It could be very useful.
Angel: Especially if Kek demons weren't extinct.
Wesley: They are? Oh dear. Well, perhaps there's one out there hibernating, ready to awaken at any moment and embark on a grizzly rampage.
Angel: I'll keep my fingers crossed.

Angel: She's making brownies.
Wesley: Oh, is that what I smell? I thought I'd tracked something in.

Angel: I've been around death before. A lot. I've lost people. I've killed people...
Cordelia: And you are dead.

Ryan: You're bleeding. Are you gonna cry?
Angel: I don't think so. I don't know. Let me think. No...yeah...no. Nope, not gonna cry.

I'll be fine, really. I'm not a big bleeder.

Seth (smoking): This bother you?
Angel: No.
Seth: Lotta health nuts these days, you know. Like anyone needs to live forever.
Angel: No one needs that.

Okay, how do I get someone to eat Eucalyptus Powder? [doorbell rings] I made brownies.

Angel: Everything was...very good.
Seth: Roast was a little dry.
Angel: No! It was full of...roasty goodness.

Paige: What's your secret, Angel?
Angel: I use chocolate. That's why they're brown -- which gives them their name. Brownies!

I know you're not planning to kill me, Wesley. But you're willing to. And that's good.

Ethros: You're dealing with forces beyond your comprehension.
Angel: Yeah? Well it's a hobby of mind.

Seth: I was just trying to hold my family together.
Angel: I think you did.

The Prodigal

[as Liam]: Everyone gets corrupted. But I find some forms of corruption are more pleasant.

Kate: So they...so they die then.
Angel: Yeah.
Kate: Sorry, I guess I'm still having a little trouble with this "otherworldy" stuff.
Angel: Right...although demon's aren't technically otherworldly. I mean, in fact, they were here [Kate walks away] ...first.

Angel: It's about that demon from this morning...
Kate: If you insist on talking about this stuff, could you please not say that word? It makes me... It makes me, I don't know, just uncomfortable. Just say... Evil Thing, okay?

Angel: It's just that the ... uh... Evil Thing -- turns out that it wasn't an evil Thing.
Kate: The Evil Thing wasn't an evil Thing?
Angel: Well, it was an Evil Thing, in terms of that word. It just wasn't an evil Evil Thing.
Kate: There are not-evil Evil Things?
Angel: Well, yeah.

Angel: I think that the demon...I think the *train* may have been targeted for a reason.
Kate: An Evil Thing needs a reason?

I don't know. Ever since she ran me through with a 2 by 4, things have been different.

I'm just afraid if she keeps struggling with the bigger picture, she'll miss the details.

Angel: I could feel them above me. As I slept in the earth. Heartbeats. The blood coursing through their veins. Was it a dream?
Darla: A dream for you. Soon -- their nightmare.

Sometimes the price we end up paying for one bad choice isn't commensurate with the offense.

Strange. Somehow, you seemed taller when I was alive.

You said I'd never amount to anything. Oh, you were wrong. (Morphs) You see, father? I have made something of myself after all.

Vampire: Looks like you're not welcome here, bro.
Angel: He dies, and the very instant his soul leaves his body, I'm through this door, and I kill you both.

Wesley: What happened to calmly, cautiously, and deliberately investigating before rushing in?
Angel: That was Plan A. We've since moved on to Plan B.
Wesley: And Plan B is?
Angel: [brandishing an axe] Do I really have to explain it to you, Wesley?

Demon: You don't understand what stands before you!
Angel: Oh... a big ugly drug-running demon who thinks he's a lot scarier than really he is, maybe? Yeah, she knows.

Demon: You're dead!
Angel: I'm already dead. (chops his head off) Welcome to the club.

Never trust an evil Evil Thing.

Angel: Kate, I know that what happened with your father...
Kate: My father was human. And you don't know anything about that.

Darla: Your victory over him took but moments.
Angel: Yes.
Darla: But his defeat of you will last lifetimes.
Angel: What are you talking about? He can't defeat me now.
Darla: Nor can he ever approve of you. In this world or any other. What we once were informs all that we have become. The same love will infect our hearts, even if they no longer beat. Simple death won't change that.
Angel: Love. Is this the work of love?
Darla: Darling boy. So young. Still so very young.

The Ring

Angel: Do you two need to see a counselor?
Cordelia: No, I'm way too single entendre to benefit from therapy.
Wesley: I don't know why you take everything so personally.
Cordelia: Me? Oh, this is rich coming from Mr. Don't Talk to Me Before I've Had my Flagon of Oatbran in the Morning.
Angel: Children, we have company.

Angel: Mind if I play, Ernie?
Ernie: It's invitation only.
Angel: Then invite me. It's a been a while since I've played, so I might be a little rusty on the rules. But I think my Jacks (tosses pictures of Jack on the table) beat your pair.

Angel: You set me up.
Darin: It was a group effort.

I asked for a room with a view.

We'll have so much to talk about during the long winter nights.

Angel: Someone needs to put you in your place. You...and your brother.
Jack: Someone may. Someday. But not you. And not today.
Angel: Why put off 'til tomorrow what you can do today?

Darin: Let him go.
Angel: Soon as you let us go.
Darin: Who do you think you are, Moses?

Angel: He's your brother.
Darin (shoots): Now he's my dead brother.

Lilah: How do you feel?
Angel: Like I was hit by lightning after the truck ran me over.

You're a fight fan. And a lawyer. Let me guess -- Wolfram & Hart.

Lilah: There's not one reason why we can't work together.
Angel: You're right...there are about a thousand.

Trepkos: It was a good fight.
Angel (nearly collapses): I coulda taken ya.

Cordelia: Angel, you don't look so...well it's a good thing you heal fast.
Angel: It's also a good thing you guys found me in time.
Cordelia: We weren't going to let anything happen to you. Well, I mean beyond the slavery and the severe beatings and stuff.

You both did great. And I think we did a good thing here.

Eternity

Wesley: We're doomed.
Angel: Maybe we can make a break for it.
Wesley: Impossible.
Angel: Front exit?
Wesley: They'd spot us instantly.
Angel: Back door?
Wesley: Blocked.
Angel: That's it then. We're trapped.
Wesley: We might try shouting fire...It's not technically a crowded theater.

And I thought I knew eternity.

Cordelia: Angel? Was I good?
Angel: I wouldn't say it if I didn't think so.
Cordelia: Thanks! (beat) You didn't say it.

Hey, you know, it was a night in the theatre I'll never forget.

Cordelia: I was working him all night, and he gave you his card?
Angel: He thought I had a quality.

Rebecca: Can we talk?
Angel: Sure, right in here.
Rebecca: (to her bodyguards): Stay.
Angel: (to Wes & Cordy): Stay.

Rebecca: You're not fond of sunshine.
Angel: I'm a night person.

Angel: I'm sorry. But I can't take your case.
Cordelia: Are you insane?! (Pretends to sneeze)

Angel: Cordelia, she's just a person.
Cordelia: Spoken like a true non-person.

Angel: I'm not what you think.
Rebecca: You're not? Because -- no reflection, dark private office, instantly knowing those letters weren't written in blood -- I guess what I'd would think is...vampire.
Angel: Then again...
Rebecca: Which is impossible. Bela Lugosi, Gary Oldman -- they're vampires.
Angel: Frank Langella was the only performance I believed.

Rebecca: Do you drink blood?
Angel: Yeah. But not people.
Rebecca: You're not a killer.
Angel: I gave that up.
Rebecca: Well, there's a support group for everything in this town, I guess.

Angel: Cordelia. You're here. And . . . you brought a cross.
Cordelia: And along with three double half-caf non-fat skinny lattes.
Angel: And a cross.

No. I told her I was a vampire and that daytime patio dining was out.

Rebecca: Wow, it's sort of what you'd expect -- and sort of not.
Angel: There's no coffin.

Rebecca: Cordelia says you've saved the world.
Angel: Couple times I helped. But I almost had it sucked into Hell once, too.

Angelus: Oh, God, I love this stuff. Wow! Remind me to get the name of your dealer before I kill you.

Angelus: In all my years, I never killed a famous person before. But with no witnesses, hey, who's going to believe me? Maybe we could take a picture. I know! We'll do it like we did back in the day. I'll keep your head on a stick as proof.
Rebecca: My head on a stick?
Angelus: Well, okay -- pike.

Rebecca: You're just trying to scare me.
Angelus: Is it workin'?
Rebecca: No. (Angelus smacks her around a bit)
Angelus: How 'bout now?

Angelus: Boy, you know, you could stand to lose a few pounds. Hey, I'll help you with that.

Rebecca: I just wanted to...
Angelus: Be like me? Hey, can't say I blame you. I'm one happy fellow.

Angelus: Tell you what. I'll torture ya for a few unbelievably long hours, and you can tell me if this is the lifestyle for you.

(Rebecca hits Angelus with a vase)
Angelus: Now that I respect.
(Rebecca hits him again)
Angelus: Women.

Angelus: Name's Angelus.
Wesley: I don't wish to resort to drastic measures. But unless you listen to reason, I warn you...
Angelus: You're warning me? What happened, Wes? You suddenly grow a pair?

Angelus: Good news, Wes Old Boy! You don't have an inferiority complex. You're just simply inferior.

Cordelia: Why don't you just...just...
Angelus: Just just just just...Line! "Of course, a time will come...when Torvald is not as devoted...to me." You were really, let me tell you, bad.
Cordelia: Stop it.
Angelus: Why? You didn't. I mean, I've been to Hell, but that was so much worse.

Angelus: You had to be there. There wasn't a dry eye in the house, everybody was just laughing so hard.

Angelus: Here's a thought. Maybe you could get Raven here to coach you, then you'd actually suck.

Cordelia: Back off.
Angelus: What're you gonna do? Melt me?

Angelus: That's just drinking water.
Cordelia: Fresh from a mountain spring, delivered right to our door, then blessed every second Tuesday by Father Mackie, the local parish priest, while you're down in the bat cave sleeping through the better part of the day. Don't believe me? (Throws the water at his face, he screams and paws at his eyes before realising that it's just water) And the Oscar goes to...

Cordelia: Are you still evil?
Angel: I'm so sorry.
Cordelia: Can I get another reading on that line, please?

Angel: I need to apologize to both of you.
Wesley: There's really no need.
Cordelia: Uh, hello?

Angel: Cordelia...
Cordelia: Okay, here's something I never thought I would say to you: Wesley's right.

Angel: So we're okay then?
Cordelia: I'm too big of a person to let something so petty get in the way of our friendship.
Angel: I appreciate that. (pause) You're not going to untie me, are you?
Cordelia: Pffft!

Wesley? Cordelia? Guys?

Five by Five

Name Marquez? (Marquez nods) Good. I hate saving the wrong guy.

Angel: Can I take off this blindfold yet?
Darla: No.
Angel: Can I take off something else?

Darla: Happy Birthday, Angelus.
Angel: She's a gypsy.
Darla: I looked everywhere.
Angel: What would I do without you?
Darla: Wither and die. But she's not just for you. I get to watch.

Next time they come after you, I'm not going to be there. And your friends aren't going to be there either -- not after being cut up and incinerated.

Angel: You're gonna have to face your demons some time.
Marquez: What if I don't want to face my demons?
Angel: Then you'll have to face mine.

Lindsey MacDonald: I request a dismissal of all charges against my client, whose reputation has been irreparably damaged by these proceedings. He's a law-abiding and upstanding...citizen.
Angel: Your client really is. Except for that pesky drug dealing and murder stuff.

Angel: Not everyone screams.
Darla: What?
Angel: When you kill 'em. Some just stand there, frozen. While others...
Darla: What are you doing? Are we playing a game?
Angel: The children -- they usually scream.
Darla: Yes. They sound just like little pigs. Have you brought me some?

Funny. You'd think with all the people I've maimed and killed, I wouldn't be able to remember Every - Single - One.

Angel: Giles said she left Sunnydale about a week ago. Described her mental state as borderline psychotic.
Cordelia: That explains her outfit.

Angel: Make yourselves scarce. I don't want to give her any free targets.
Wesley: You've been targeted by a psychotic. I'm certainly not going to run and hide.
Cordelia: I like the plan where I'm scarce.
Wesley: We've got to band together. Strength in numbers.
Cordelia: Two's a number.

Wesley: It seems you're taking this personally.
Angel: She tried to shoot my own personal back, so yeah.

Wesley: She's not a demon. She's a sick, sick girl. If there's even a chance she can be reasoned with...
Angel: There was. Last year, I had a shot at saving her. I was pulling her back from the brink when some British guy kidnaped her and made damn sure she'd never trust another living soul.
Cordelia: Angel, it's not Wesley's fault that "some British guy" ruined your. . . oh wait. That was you. Go on.
Wesley: You don't need to.

Faith: Hey, baby. Come give us a hug.
Angel: I was hoping you'd stop by. Always good to see old friends.

Lawyer: We have to close Gruber now. Before the soft offer becomes hard and the stock goes...
Angel: Through the ceiling!
Lawyer: In the toilet!
Angel: Right.

Angel: Where's Faith?
Lindsey MacDonald: Should I know what you're talking about?
Angel: Your new employee.
Lindsey MacDonald: It's a big firm. Tell you what I can do, I can give you the number to personnel, though. I'm sure they'd be glad to handle your problem.
Angel: You'd remember this one -- pretty, dark hair, kills things.

Angel: Too bad the body burned up before it hit the ground. I mighta needed a good lawyer.
Lindsey MacDonald: I'm sorry. We only handle a certain class of clientele.
Angel: I'm sure I've killed enough people to qualify.

Angel: By the way, you never told me how much I'm worth dusted, just out of curiosity.
Faith: $15,000 plus expenses.
Angel: You're kidding.
Faith: Hey, I'm young. I'm gonna work my way up.
Angel: You feel young, do you, Faith? You're looking pretty worn out to me.

Sanctuary

Angel: Donuts?
Wesley: Developed a sweet fang, have you?

Angel: It wasn't too long ago that you were the one making a case for her rehabilitation.
Wesley: It wasn't too long ago I had full feeling in my right arm!

Angel: He'll come around.
Cordelia: Wesley? Sure. People always get a little funny right after they've been sadistically tortured. Well, you'd know.

Cordelia: I need you to sign these.
Angel: You understand why we have to help Faith, don't you?
Cordelia: Totally. And here.
Angel: We can't just arbitrarily decide whose soul is worth saving and whose isn't.
Cordelia: Oh, I know. And this one. Thanks!
Angel: Those were all made out to you.
Cordelia: Yeah!
Angel: Paid vacation.
Cordelia: Like I'm gonna stick around here while a psycho case is roaming loose downstairs with 3 tons of medieval weaponry? Not! Oh, and I'm thinking -- sugar high? Maybe not a good idea.

Angel: You should be resting.
Faith: I've been asleep for eight months. You rest.

You go out that door, you'll be running for the rest of your life. My bet is, it'd be a pretty short run.

Faith: So, how does this work?
Angel: There's no real simple answer to that. I won't lie to you and tell you it'll be easy. Because it won't be. Just because you've decided to change doesn't mean the world's ready for you to. Truth is, no matter how much you suffer, no matter how many good deeds you do to try to make up for the past, you may never balance out the cosmic scale. The only thing I can promise you is that you'll probably be haunted, and maybe for the rest of your life.
Faith: (pointing at the microwave) So, how does this work?

Faith: I gotta be the first Slayer in history to be sponsored by a vampire.
Angel: Yeah, well I got some experience in that area, too.

Faith: God, B. How'm I ever gonna make things right with her?
Angel: Faith, this isn't about Buffy.

Faith: All my life, there was only one person who tried to be my friend. Went out of their way when I had no right or reason to expect her to, and...I screwed her. Not to mention her boyfriend. Only him literally.
Angel: Faith, you and I never...
Faith: No, not you. The new one. (pause) Oh my God. Angel, I'm so sorry.
Angel: No, there. You can say it. That's good.

Angel: Is that why you're here? To punish her?
Buffy: I was worried about you.

Angel: She's not gonna run, Buffy.
Buffy: Why would she, when she has her brave knight to protect her? Got you. Did she cry? Pouty lips? Heaving bosom?

Buffy: You hit me.
Angel: Not to go all schoolyard on you, but you hit me first. In case you've forgotten, you're a little bit stronger than I am.

Buffy: She's playing you. She tried to kill you.
Angel: That was just. . . That was just a cry for help.
Buffy: A cry for help is when you say "Help" in a loud voice.

Angel: I know Faith did some bad things to you.
Buffy: You can't possibly know.
Angel: You can't possibly know what she's going through.
Buffy: But of course you do. I'm sorry. I can't be in your club. I've never murdered anyone.

Wesley: We need a plan. Buffy can protect Faith.
Angel: I'm not sure that's her agenda.

Buffy: Do you have any idea what it was like for me to see you with her? That you went behind my back...
Angel: Buffy, this wasn't about you. This was about saving somebody's soul. That's what I do here, and you're not a part of it. That was your idea, remember? We stay away from each other.
Buffy: I came here because you were in danger.
Angel: I'm in danger every day. You came here because of Faith. You were looking for vengeance.
Buffy: I have a right to it.
Angel: Not in my city.
Buffy: I have someone in my life now. That I love. It's not what you and I had. It's very new. You know what makes it new? I trust him. I know him.
Angel: That's great. It's nice. You moved on. I can't. You found someone new. I'm not allowed to, remember? I see you again, it cuts me up inside. And the person I share that with is me. You don't know me anymore, so don't come down here with your great new life and expect me to do things your way. Go home.

Buffy: See? Faith wins again.
Angel: Go.

Angel: For a taciturn shadowy guy, I have a big mouth.
Wesley: Do you want to go after her?
Angel: Yes.

Wesley: I don't know how much my opinion counts for, but I think you did the right thing.
Angel: Yelling at Buffy?
Wesley: No. The other thing.
Angel: I didn't do it. Faith did.
Wesley: Perhaps she's strong enough to make it. Peace is not an easy thing to find.
Angel: She has a chance.

War Zone

Cordelia: Mmmah. I've missed that smell.
Wesley: Camembert, I believe.
Cordelia: What? No. Money. I like to smell a little money once and awhile.
Angel: She's not just saying that. Hide some in the office some time and watch her. It's uncanny.

Angel: Thanks for having us.
David Nabbit: It's a pleasure. Who are you?

David Nabbit: Are you familiar with Dungeons & Dragons?
Angel: Yeah, I've seen a few.
Wesley: You mean the, uh, role playing game.
Angel: Oh. Game. Right.

David Nabbit: When I moved here, I thought it was all glamour and valet parking. There's a whole world here that no one ever sees.
Angel: More than one.

Madame Dorian: We don't do vampires.
Angel: I just came to talk.
Madame Dorian: We don't do that either.

Lenny: What do you want?
Angel: Good question. What do I want. Love, family, place on this planet I can call my own. But you know what?
Lenny: What?
Angel: I'm never going to have any of those things. And unless these few minutes go exactly the way I want them to, neither are you.

Lenny: Look, pal. You're obviously not from around here. But trust me, you do *not* want to see my bad side.
Angel: You show me yours -- (morphs into his Game Face) -- I'll show you mine.

Ow! You know, for some reason, I'm getting the impression you don't like me too much. Maybe I'm just overreacting.

Wesley: Oh my.
Angel: It's upside down.
Wesley: Certainly not something you ought to have framed.
Cordelia: How does that feel?
Wesley: I can't possibly imagine it was pleasant.
Cordelia: I was talking to Angel.

Cordelia: You look...
Angel: Like I've been beaten and stabbed?
Cordelia: Want to see the check again?

Ah. Ah. Can I just see that check again?

Cordelia: Trying to open that? They locked you in, huh?
Angel: No. I just love old meat lockers.
Wesley: You should have tried to call us on your cell phone. (pause) You probably forgot you had it.
Angel: These things hardly ever work. Besides it was a lot easier and quicker to just...Look, I'm the boss here. I say when we use the cell phones, and people are gonna die, and I have to go.
Cordelia: You're welcome.

Angel: Here's the deal. You can go.
Knox: What?
Angel: If you go now, and I never see any of you again, you get to live.
Knox: Are you high?
Angel: L.A.'s my territory. You want to stay out of it for the rest of your eternal lives. These kids, my town -- off limits from now on. Vamp: Who the Hell are you? You know who you're talkin' to, you fool?
Angel: Name's Angelus. (dusts Knox) I wasn't actually talkin' to you.

Angel: I'll be around.
Gunn: I don't need no help.
Angel: I might.

Blind Date

How am I supposed to fight evil if they won't even put it behind bars?

Angel: She murdered a man right in front of me, and I can't even testify to that fact in a court of law.
Cordelia: Well, maybe in night court you could...

How am I expected to do battle if I can't even get into the ring?

Angel: It's their system, and it's one that works. It works because there's no guilt, there's no torment, no consequences. It's pure. I remember what that was like. Sometimes I miss that clarity.
Cordelia: But...not the trying to kill your friends and family part, right?

Lindsey: I don't want to be here any more than you want to see me. I don't have a choice.
Angel: You always have a choice. You sold your soul for a fifth floor office and a company car.

Lindsey: What was your father? A merchant, right? Linen and silk? Did pretty well. Had a couple of servants -- 'til you killed them.
Angel: Just the one.

Lindsey: I guess it's fair to say you've never seen anything like real poverty. I'm talking dirt poor. No shoes, no toilet. Six of us kids in one room. And come flu season it was down to four. I was seven when they took the house. They just came right in and took it. And my daddy's bein' nice, you know? Joking with the bastards while he signs the deed. See we had a choice -- you got stepped on or you got to steppin'. And I swore to myself I wasn't goin' to be the guy standing there with a stupid grin on my face while my life got dribbled out...
Angel: Ooof. I nodded off. Did you get to the part where you're evil?

Lindsey: I go back there; they're gonna kill me.
Angel: That's what we call an acceptable risk.
Lindsey: I get myself killed, that'll convince you I've changed?
Angel: It's a start.

Gunn: Give me one good reason.
Angel: It'll be extremely dangerous.
Gunn: Okay!

To Shanshu in LA

Cordelia: Nobody gets my humor.
Angel: I thought it was funny.

Cordelia: Angel's going to die?
Angel: Oh. Anything else?

Kate: What was it?
Angel: Slime demon.

I'm sick and tired of you blaming me for everything you can't handle. You want to be enemies? Try me.

Don't believe everything you're foretold.

Wesley: I...I'm not used to...
Angel: He's not used to the new you.
Cordelia: I know what's out there now. We have a lot of evil to fight, a lot of people to help. I just hope Skin-n-Bones here can figure out what those lawyers raised sometime before that prophecy kicks in and you croak. (pause) That was the old me wasn't it?
Angel: I like them both.

Cordelia: Wow. Angel human.
Angel: That'd be nice.

Cordelia: What was that thing about him having to fulfill his destiny first?
Wesley: Well, it's, uh, it won't happen tomorrow or the next day. He has to survive the coming darkness, the apocalyptic battles, a few plagues, and some...oh, several--not that many--fiends that will be unleashed upon the world.
Angel: So don't break out the champagne just yet.

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